Getting scammed is a traumatic experience.
I don’t care if people think I was stupid, naive, or not thinking straight.
I was in an emotionally vulnerable state and the scammers played with my mind like psychological rape.
If the debilitating effects of a traumatic event last more than several weeks, you’re going through Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).
I knew I was traumatized, but I didn’t know it was PTSD.
When I listened to this Braincare podcast, only then I realized how I had dragged on my PTSD for many more months than necessary.
A Misconception About PTSD
Most people think that PTSD only happens to war veterans, rape victims, or survivors of a brain injury. Basically, those who have gone through some sort of physical stress.
It’s not commonly thought that PTSD can also be purely psychological.
It can happen to any of us who have experienced a distressing event such as a scam, a toxic workplace, or even just witnessing parents’ divorce process.
According to the trauma coach Michelle Rosenthal, you’re experiencing PTSD when the psychological symptoms from a distressing event last more than 30 days.
Signs Of PTSD
It’s worth noticing the symptoms you may go through after a traumatic event. You may experience either or all of the following:
- Avoiding anything that has to do with the event and not thinking or talking about it at all.
- Having intrusive thoughts about the event that keep recurring in your mind like a broken record.
- You become hypervigilant; your fight, flight, or freeze survival mechanism is constantly switched on.
- You can’t hold a consistent mood to engage socially or professionally in a productive way.
How I Reacted To The Traumatic Event
Even months after the scam, my mind kept going back to parts of the event. This often happened at night when I was done with work for the day and alone with my thoughts. I usually ended up crying myself to sleep.
In retrospect, I was in a constant “fight” mode.
This was represented in the form of working my ass off to get back the money I lost and more.
I was just focused on work and nothing else.
I was fighting to redeem myself.
Don’t Avoid Therapy
This is one piece of advice I’d give to anyone who has experienced any traumatic event regardless of the severity.
I know that in some countries like Malaysia psychological support isn’t very accessible and can be costly.
Even so, I’d suggest spending your money on therapy especially if the symptoms of a traumatic event affect your daily life.
If it’s a mild case, seeking support from a friend or someone you feel safe with can be good enough.
As long as you’re aware that you’ve been through something horrible and that you need help, you will find a solution that suits you.
Prioritize Self Care And Cut Some Slack
On one hand, the fight mode I was in helped me to carry on with my freelancing work and gain a few more clients. That was financially beneficial for me.
However, it was at the expense of my mental and physical health because eventually, I got burnt out.
What I would have done differently is that I’d set aside time for self-care.
I would take regular breaks during the day and dedicate one day a week to completely switch off.
Your Experience Is Valid
Remember that whatever others may say, your experience and feelings are valid.
Some people, even those closest to you, may ridicule you for acting the way you acted.
Try your best to ignore them. I know it’s hard. I spent many weeks trying to push away my mum’s voice saying that I was stupid to fall for an obvious scam.
But it is possible to get over the negative voices and heal your wounds.
All you need to do is recognize that you’re not okay and reach out for help.
